hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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