Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize
