I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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