we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
mondays should just be called national damage control day
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize