Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
The adults are the big ones right?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
