Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
