Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
how does that bad decision feel?
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
