I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Randomize
