it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize