stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
