Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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