I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize
