how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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