I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
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