I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
