You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
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