Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
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