I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize
