if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
