Barsexuality is the new black.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
