she takes plan B like it's going out of style
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
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