Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
i dont even know how to be here
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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