I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize