Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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