Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize