i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
