Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
