can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
