U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize