May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
...so i touched it.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
