I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
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