you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
