Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
