I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
