dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Randomize
