i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
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i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize