i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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