Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
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