hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Randomize
