He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Randomize
