No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
