Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Dicks are not precious.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Randomize
