i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Randomize
