All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
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Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
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Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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