Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I said "one day" and that day is not today
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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