sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Randomize
