so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
is wine microwaveable?
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
