Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
We just shotgunned beers for America
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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