After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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