I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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