Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
