lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Its about making memories worth repressing
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
